1. Always Let the Man Take the Lead
Back in the day, women were expected to sit back, smile, and let the man call all the shots. He was the one who asked her out, decided where they’d go, picked her up, paid for dinner, and determined when the night was over. The idea was that a woman should be demure, mysterious, and just grateful to be invited along for the ride. Even if she had an opinion, she was supposed to keep it to herself to avoid seeming too assertive. If she took the lead, she’d be seen as desperate or, even worse, “unladylike.” These days, that kind of thinking feels incredibly outdated. Women can ask men out, plan dates, and split the check without it being scandalous. Dating is a two-way street, and relationships work better when both people have a say. No one wants to feel like a passive observer in their own love life says MSN.
Modern dating thrives on mutual effort, and no one has time for old-school gender roles. Sure, some people still like a traditional approach, but expecting men to do all the work feels ridiculous. If a woman waits around for a guy to make the first move, she might be waiting forever. On the flip side, men don’t want all that pressure, either. They like it when someone shows interest in them rather than just hoping they’ll read minds. It’s 2025—everyone can swipe right, send the first text, or plan a fun night out. Relationships work best when they’re partnerships, not one-sided performances.
2. Play Hard to Get No Matter What
For decades, women were told to act distant, ignore phone calls, and pretend they weren’t interested—even if they really liked someone. The idea was that being unavailable would make a man chase them harder. Magazines drilled this into women’s heads, warning that if they were too eager, they’d scare men away. The whole thing was a manipulative game designed to keep men on their toes. Meanwhile, guys were left confused, wondering if they should keep trying or if the girl really wasn’t into them. Playing hard to get was basically a form of emotional acrobatics, forcing people to suppress their true feelings explains Cosmopolitan.
Now, most people realize that honest communication is way more attractive. No one has the time or patience to decode mixed signals or chase someone who won’t give them the time of day. If you like someone, it’s fine to show it. Modern dating is already confusing enough without throwing mind games into the mix. Confidence is attractive, but pretending you don’t care? That’s just exhausting. It’s refreshing when someone knows what they want and goes for it. Playing games might have worked in the ’50s, but today, it’s just a good way to get ghosted.
3. Dress to Impress—Always
In vintage dating advice, women were told they should never leave the house without looking their absolute best. Some magazines even advised putting on makeup before their husband woke up so he’d never see them looking anything less than perfect. The idea was that men were visual creatures who needed constant aesthetic stimulation to stay interested. If a woman let herself go—even for a second—she risked losing his attention. Men weren’t off the hook, either. They were expected to be well-groomed and polished, always looking like they just stepped out of an ad for men’s cologne adds Readers Digest.
Today, we’ve all collectively realized that attraction isn’t based on flawless lipstick or the perfect outfit. Sure, dressing up can be fun, but no one should feel like they have to maintain a picture-perfect appearance 24/7. Relationships are about comfort, and if you can’t lounge around in sweatpants with your partner, what’s the point? Real attraction comes from connection, personality, and shared experiences—not just a well-coordinated wardrobe. Dressing up is still great for special occasions, but everyday life? A messy bun and a hoodie will do just fine.
4. Never Let a Man Know You’re Smarter Than Him
There was a time when women were told to downplay their intelligence to avoid intimidating men. The logic was that men wanted to feel like the smarter, more capable partner in a relationship. If a woman showed she was too knowledgeable, too opinionated, or too ambitious, she might scare him off. This led to generations of women pretending not to know things they actually did. They laughed at jokes they didn’t find funny and asked questions they already knew the answers to. The goal? To make men feel superior and keep them interested.
Thankfully, most of us have realized that intelligence is attractive, not threatening. A good relationship is built on mutual respect, and that means valuing each other’s thoughts, ideas, and insights. If someone is turned off by a partner’s intelligence, that’s their problem. No one should have to pretend to be less than they are to make someone else feel comfortable. The best connections happen when both people challenge and inspire each other. At the end of the day, confidence and authenticity will always be more attractive than playing dumb.
5. Always Order a Small Salad on a Date
Vintage dating guides had strict rules about what women should eat in front of men. The number one rule? Keep it light. A woman ordering a burger or a plate of pasta was considered unladylike, as if her appetite was something to be ashamed of. A small salad was seen as the perfect meal—dainty, delicate, and feminine. Eating too much was seen as unattractive, as if a hearty appetite translated into greed or lack of self-control. It was a ridiculous expectation that made first dates feel like performances instead of enjoyable experiences.
Now, most people couldn’t care less about what their date eats. If anything, sharing a big meal and enjoying food together is a bonding experience. No one wants to sit across from someone who’s miserably picking at a pile of lettuce while they’re trying to enjoy a real meal. Food is meant to be enjoyed, and there’s nothing more attractive than someone who’s confident enough to eat what they actually want. A person’s worth isn’t tied to the number of calories they consume. Plus, no one wants to date someone who’s starving all the time.
6. Accept a Date With Any Man Who Asks
There was a time when women were advised to never turn down a date—no matter how uninterested they were. The idea was that dating was a numbers game, and every opportunity should be taken, even if there was zero attraction. The logic behind this advice was that men had fragile egos, and rejecting them was cruel. Women were expected to say yes just to be polite, even if they had no intention of ever seeing the guy again. This led to awkward, uncomfortable dates and wasted time.
Today, people know that dating should be intentional, not just something you do out of obligation. If you’re not interested, it’s perfectly okay to say no. Time is valuable, and no one should feel forced into a situation they don’t want to be in. Mutual attraction and respect are essential for any successful date. Saying yes to someone just to spare their feelings doesn’t do anyone any favors. If a person can’t handle a simple “no, thank you,” they probably aren’t ready for a healthy relationship anyway.
7. Never Call Him First
Back in the day, women were told that if they called a man first, they were being “too forward.” This old-school idea suggested that a woman should always wait for the man to make the first move, and if she didn’t, she’d be seen as desperate. The rule was to play it cool and let the guy think he was in control. If a woman called him first, she’d risk scaring him off or looking like she had no life outside of him.
These days, no one follows that rule. If you’re thinking about someone and want to talk to them, just do it. Relationships are about clear communication, and waiting around for someone to make the first move just isn’t practical. Calling first doesn’t make you seem desperate—it makes you seem confident and interested. If a guy can’t handle a woman reaching out first, that’s a red flag, not an opportunity to play games. When you like someone, go ahead and call them; it’s the 21st century!
8. Never Split the Check
In the vintage dating world, the man always paid for the meal, drinks, and sometimes even the movie ticket. The belief was that paying for everything was a way to show his generosity and his commitment to the relationship. Women were expected to let them do this, no questions asked, and it was considered rude to offer to pay your share. If a woman did, she was often seen as disrespectful or too independent. This led to awkward moments when both parties were unsure of how to handle the bill at the end of the night.
Today, people recognize that splitting the check is totally acceptable and can even be empowering. More often than not, couples prefer to share the financial load, especially if they’re on equal footing. In fact, some people find it rude if one person insists on paying for everything. A relationship isn’t about one person carrying the financial burden. If one partner wants to treat the other, that’s one thing, but both parties should feel comfortable discussing money and splitting costs. The idea that one gender should always pick up the tab is long gone—thankfully!
9. Don’t Reveal Too Much Too Soon
Vintage dating advice often warned against being “too open” early in a relationship. Sharing too many personal details was considered off-limits, as it could make someone feel overwhelmed. People were encouraged to keep certain aspects of their lives—particularly their emotions—hidden until the relationship “warranted” it. Revealing vulnerabilities or personal history too quickly was thought to make you seem “needy” or “desperate.”
In contrast, today’s relationships thrive on honesty and transparency. Getting to know someone means being open and vulnerable about who you are. Sure, there’s a balance between oversharing and keeping some things to yourself, but authenticity is the foundation of any strong relationship. Hiding who you really are in an effort to appear “perfect” or “mysterious” will only lead to frustration and miscommunication. Opening up early helps create trust and a genuine connection. There’s no shame in being your true self from the get-go.
10. Never Wear a Hat on a Date
For many years, vintage dating advice suggested that a woman should never wear a hat on a date. Hats were considered too casual, and any kind of accessory that concealed the hair was thought to make a person seem disinterested in their appearance. The belief was that a date was an opportunity to showcase one’s beauty and charm, and a hat just got in the way of that. A woman was supposed to have her hair perfectly styled to catch the man’s attention.
These days, no one cares if you’re wearing a hat. In fact, hats can be an accessory that shows off your personality. Whether you’re rocking a beanie or a wide-brimmed sun hat, if it makes you feel good, go for it. Fashion is about self-expression, not conforming to outdated rules. People are more interested in how you carry yourself than whether or not your hair is visible. In a world where everyone is trying to be themselves, rocking a hat on a date can actually be a fun conversation starter.
11. Always Have a “Perfect” Relationship
Vintage advice often emphasized the importance of having a relationship that looked perfect on the outside. Couples were supposed to appear happy, composed, and ideal, especially when they were out in public. There was this pressure to project an image of the “perfect couple” at all times, even if things behind closed doors weren’t as perfect as they seemed. If there were any signs of conflict or imperfection, it was considered embarrassing.
Today, people are much more accepting of the messiness that comes with real relationships. No one expects couples to be flawless, and in fact, admitting struggles is part of what makes relationships stronger. The idea that a “perfect” relationship is one without conflict is laughable now. Healthy relationships involve compromise, growth, and yes—sometimes disagreements. Being able to work through issues together is more meaningful than keeping up appearances.
12. Always End a Date by Playing It Cool
Vintage dating etiquette recommended that you never let the other person know you were too eager or interested, especially at the end of a date. If you had a great time, you were supposed to act aloof and not let your emotions show too much. The key was to keep things “mysterious” and make the other person wonder if you liked them. Anything that might hint at genuine affection was seen as a turn-off.
In reality, being open about your feelings makes relationships stronger. If you had a wonderful time on a date, let the person know! A simple, “I had a great time, let’s do it again soon” goes a long way. There’s no need to hide your feelings behind a cool, distant exterior. Modern dating is all about honesty, so if you feel a connection, express it. Pretending to be indifferent doesn’t make you look desirable—it makes you seem insincere. Just be yourself, and the right person will appreciate you for it.