1. Lawn Darts
Lawn darts, or “Jarts,” were a backyard staple in the ’70s. The game seemed innocent enough—tossing heavy metal darts into plastic rings on the grass—but those things were practically missiles. Each dart had a sharp, weighted tip that could pierce the ground, or worse, someone’s skull. Tragically, there were several serious injuries and even a few deaths before they were finally banned in the late ’80s says Wikipedia.
What’s wild is that parents were just casually handing these out at birthday parties, completely unaware of the danger. Kids would run across the yard, dodging flying darts like a real-life game of dodgeball meets archery. You’d never see something like this sold at a toy store today, not with modern safety standards. Honestly, it’s amazing anyone survived a round of Jarts.
2. Clackers
Clackers were hypnotic and loud, and they also had the potential to shatter into flying plastic shards. The toy was simple—two acrylic balls attached to either end of a string. The goal was to swing them until they smacked together above and below your hand in a rhythmic clacking motion shares MSN.
Unfortunately, if you got too into it, the balls could crack or explode from the impact. There were countless reports of kids getting hit in the face or getting small plastic projectiles to the eye. They were pulled from shelves eventually, but not before sending a few kids to the ER. It was basically a toy that turned you into a human Newton’s Cradle, with a risk of facial injury adds AOL.com.
3. Creepy Crawlers Thingmaker
The Creepy Crawlers Thingmaker was like an Easy-Bake Oven for horror fans, only way more dangerous. It let kids squirt colored goo into metal molds and then bake them using a hot plate that reached over 300 degrees. No childproofing, no safety shield—just an open heating element and a bunch of goo shares All That’s Interesting.
Burns were practically a rite of passage. You’d stick your little hand too close and get a searing reminder that this was not exactly kid-friendly. Somehow, it was marketed like a fun arts and crafts set instead of the fire hazard it really was. It’s nostalgic, sure, but also a lawsuit waiting to happen by today’s standards.
4. Battlestar Galactica Missile-Firing Toys
When Battlestar Galactica toys hit shelves in the late ’70s, they featured tiny missiles you could actually fire. That might sound cool, but those little projectiles turned out to be choking hazards in disguise. One tragic case involving a child who choked to death on a missile led to a massive recall.
After that, toy manufacturers redesigned their missile-firing toys to be permanently fixed or too large to swallow. But back then, these kinds of safety oversights weren’t uncommon. Kids were trusted to know better, which is wild considering they were barely old enough to tie their shoes. It’s a toy that took a real tragedy to change the entire industry.
5. Chemistry Sets
’70s-era chemistry sets were the stuff of dreams for curious kids—and absolute nightmares for cautious parents. These kits weren’t watered down with harmless powders, either. Many included real chemicals like potassium permanganate and even sulfur, with very little instruction or warning.
Kids could mix and match to their heart’s content, which often led to noxious smells, mini explosions, or chemical burns. Protective goggles? Optional. Supervision? Rare. It was like handing a third grader a baby science lab and hoping for the best. No toy like that would even make it past a focus group today.
6. Slip ’N Slide
The Slip ’N Slide is still around in modern versions, but the original was a whole different beast. It was basically a thin sheet of plastic you’d run and dive onto, hoping you didn’t slam your head into the ground. There was zero padding and the water pressure didn’t do much to soften the ride.
Worse, the toy wasn’t really designed for adults, but that didn’t stop dads everywhere from diving in and getting injured. Back and neck injuries were so common that warnings were eventually added to keep bigger bodies off it. It was the kind of summer fun that could turn into a chiropractic visit in seconds. These days, you’d need liability insurance to sell one.
7. Super Elastic Bubble Plastic
Super Elastic Bubble Plastic was like bubble solution’s rebellious older sibling. You’d squeeze out this colorful, chemical-smelling goop from a tube and use a little straw to inflate it into bubbles. But those bubbles weren’t made of soap—they were made from a plastic resin full of toxic fumes.
The whole process involved inhaling potentially dangerous chemicals, and if you sucked instead of blew? You’d get a mouthful of poison. It was marketed as a fun, futuristic alternative to soap bubbles, but really it was a chemistry accident in a tube. There’s a reason you won’t see this stuff on shelves anymore.
8. Monster Science Kits
Monster Science Kits were sold as fun ways to make your own “growing monsters” using water and mystery powders. But some of the kits from the ’70s contained substances that could be harmful if swallowed. They were basically unregulated science experiments packed in bright boxes with cartoon monsters.
There were reports of kids eating the powders or getting them in their eyes, and because the ingredients weren’t clearly labeled, emergency rooms had a tough time responding. They didn’t always include clear instructions either, leaving kids to guess and stir. It’s hard to imagine a toy like this getting past the FDA today.
9. Belt Buckle Derringers
This one sounds like a parody, but it was real—a belt buckle that concealed a tiny cap gun. A flick of the buckle and out popped a little “derringer” that fired a cap. It was a weird mix of fashion and firepower, and somehow it made its way into kids’ toy boxes.
Even back then, it raised eyebrows, but in an era of cowboy shows and spy movies, it kind of made sense. Today, though, the idea of giving a child something that even vaguely resembles a concealed weapon is a hard no. It’s the kind of toy that would probably get you a visit from airport security now.
10. Hugo, Man of a Thousand Faces
Hugo was a soft, bald puppet head that came with a terrifying set of disguise accessories—wigs, scars, warts, and all sorts of sticky fake skin. The glue and plastic used for these disguises had questionable ingredients that irritated skin and eyes. It was a little horror movie kit packaged as a toy.
Parents were mostly just weirded out, but safety experts flagged it for potential hazards. It wasn’t exactly soothing to wake up and see your kid playing with a disfigured puppet head. Hugo earned a bit of a cult following, but he’s definitely one of those toys that wouldn’t pass any modern health inspections.
11. Kenner Easy Show Projector
This compact film projector was a cool idea, but it got dangerously hot. The Kenner Easy Show let kids watch little cartoon reels, but the bulb inside could reach temperatures that would blister your fingers. Combine that with flimsy plastic construction and you had a recipe for burns or fire.
The reels could also melt or jam inside, and there were cases of overheating that led to smoke. No auto-shutoff, no heat shielding, just good old-fashioned trial by fire. It was a toy that assumed kids could handle small-scale electronics, which sounds charming until you consider the potential for injury. Modern versions are far more protective for good reason.
12. Water Wiggle
The Water Wiggle was a chaotic sprinkler toy with a long, snake-like tube attached to a heavy metal nozzle. You’d hook it up to the hose and it would dance wildly in the air, spraying water everywhere. But if it slipped off the hose or the nozzle broke free, it became a dangerous projectile.
In the ’70s, one tragic accident involving the nozzle entering a child’s mouth led to the toy being recalled. It’s a prime example of how unpredictability doesn’t always equal fun. While it looked harmless in commercials, the reality was much more hazardous. It’s no wonder this wiggly menace didn’t survive into modern summers.